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Fairystories and Poems

Alice's Granddaughter

Cheng wanted a dragon.

Not an ordinary fire breathing, snake-like, scaly, red eyed, gold hugging, long clawed, sharp toothed winged dragon.
Not a simple, friendly, well-named, smiling, ice cream loving, English speaking, well educated dragon.

No Cheng was an overweight, master criminal and he wanted an all together different dragon.

He wanted the yellow dragon. The one and only, single and known, shining and thoughtful yellow dragon.
The problem was the yellow dragon lived in the secret garden behind the smallest door down the deepest hole

and he was too fat to get there.

And his best men who had gone down there couldn’t get through the door.

And the one who did squeeze through got lost behind a mirror and Cheng had stopped using that mirror

because all he ever saw was his man jumping up and down and waving trying to get out of the garden.
Cheng needed someone very special to get into the garden and get the yellow dragon.

But he also needed someone trustworthy so they wouldn’t keep the yellow dragon for themselves.
That or they must not know the magical power of the yellow dragon.
Then Cheng was told about England. And he was told about a girl called Alice. Who many, many years before had gained entry to the garden and come back.

And he was told she had a great granddaughter who looked just like her.
So Cheng and his men got on a plane and flew to England. And they took a house in Hampshire and they met Alice’s great granddaughter Alicia.
And he gave her presents of books and small pearls and smiled and was very happy.

And he told her tales of the yellow dragon, how clever he was, how strong he was, how fast he was, how interesting he was to talk to.
And then he told her if she knew the hole her great grandmother had fallen down, she too could get into the garden and she could find the yellow dragon who lived there and bring him back to Cheng.

Alicia smiled. She liked adventures after a fashion. It ran in her blood. So she told Cheng the great family secret.

She did know the hole her great grandmother had fallen down, only her family knew where it was and they never told anyone.
Cheng was happy and gave her another small pearl. And Alicia went off thinking about her adventure and she read up her great grandmother’s diaries because forewarned is one more than three-warned as every intelligent woman knows.
Alicia took a parachute of silk and crawled down the hole which was dusty and smelled vaguely of pelican and mushrooms and shining her torch down the hole she came to the drop and putting on the parachute she jumped shouting,
“Geronimo!” As she went she counted to ten and then pulled the rip cord. Her chute opened and she sailed down and she turned on her torch every now and then to see how she was getting along. The place now smelled like rabbits and snails.

Slowly she descended and slowly the perfume changed again to crocodiles and marshmallows.

Finally she landed on a table which was the last thing she was expecting and it smelled of hats and cigars.

She shone her torch onto the table and inscribed on it were the words,
“Alice was here 1895.”
“Well, well my great grandmother was into graffiti,” Alicia said to herself.
“You enjoy talking to yourself in the dark?” asked a gruff voice.
Alicia looked around wondering who was talking to her. She shone her torch all around but could not see anyone.
“I am down here if you are looking for me.” said the voice.
Alicia realised it was the table talking.
“Oh, hello.”
“Hello and thank you for standing on me,” it said sarcastically.
“I am sorry.”
“Its ok, people are always using me to put things on. You get used to it after a while. Not that I mind that much I would rather someone did something, being here in the dark with no one to talk to isn’t much fun. I suppose you are someone aren’t you? I would hate to be stood upon by a no one. But maybe that is my destiny. Alone in the dark not an anyone anywhere.”
“I didn’t know tables could talk,” said Alicia,
“Everything talks. Have you never heard of table talk?”
“Yes.”
“Well then.”
“But isn’t that when people talk around a table?”
“That’s what adults would have you believe, but believe me or not its really because tables talk. Its very rude to talk round a table. You wouldn’t like to be talked round. Though I suppose you wouldn’t mind being talked square either.”
“I have never been talked square or round.”
“I suppose you want the garden,” said the table.
“How do you know that?”
“Its all the young people ever want. No one wants to stay here in the dark talking to me. If you were a no one of course that would mean you did want to stay in the dark talking to me. But you are a someone aren’t you.”
“I think I must be.”
“You think? Is that fun? I always wondered what to think would be like.”
“I’m not sure it is and I’m not sure it isn’t, thinking isn’t something I have to think much about.”
“How puzzling,” said the table.
“Is it here?” Alicia asked slipping down onto the floor.
“Is what here?”
“The door to the garden.”
“Hm yes it is but you will never get into it.”
“I will when I find the bottle to make me smaller.”
“I am afraid that’s all gone. Your great grandmother drank it all.”
“How did you know she was my great grandmother.”
“You have the same feet.”
“You can tell by my feet?” she was surprised.
“I am a table, we only ever get to see people’s feet. We are very good with feet.”
“I am glad to know that. How will I ever get in?”
“Well, if I were a thinking table, and I am not sure I am, I would think that if you cannot get through the door to get to the garden, the next best thing to do is to get the garden to come through the door to get to you.”
“How do I do that?”
“Oh now that’s a question that would require a lot of thinking about,” replied the table.” Alicia scratched her head and shook her hair and frowned. But no thoughts arrived.
“There is a bottle of thinking in the cupboard by your left hand,” said the table, “That may help you.”
Alicia opened a small wooden door and there inside were several bottles with glass tops. “For boys, girls must not drink,” said one label.
“What’s that for?” she asked
“I don’t know no boys have ever landed here to try it.” said the table.
“For school teachers, one sip twice a day.”
“What is that for?”
“Oh that’s for teachers who don’t try hard enough. It helps them concentrate.”
“Well will that help me think?”
“Not unless you are school teacher.”
“For vague indigestion, drink whole bottle,” was written on another label.
“What’s vague indigestion,” she asked.
“Indigestion that doesn’t hurt enough. That drink makes it very painful.”
“Who would drink something to make their indigestion worse!” asked Alicia.
“Oh lots of people. Being a table I can’t drink at all but I think there is a bottle of polish in there.” Alicia found the polish, it was beeswax and lavender. Then she found the thinking bottle.
“To give ideas. One sip for two ideas, two sips for five ideas, three sips for genius.”
“Well, I think I should try one sip first,” said Alicia.
“Oh no go for three,” said the table.”
“Why?”
“Why then you would be the most intelligent girl in the room.”
“I am the only girl in the room.”
“Ah but you would the most intelligent girl in any room.” Alicia took one sip and thought about taking three. She took two sips and whilst she waited for an idea or two she polished the table using her handkerchief.
“Any idea yet?” it asked shining away happily. Alicia looked through the door. It was smaller than her face.
“Whistling won’t help,” she said.
“Oh no a garden isn’t a pet.”
“And asking it won’t help.”
“Oh no a garden cannot really move, its rather stuck to the ground.”
“I wonder..” she drank another sip. She sat down and pondered. She thought. She ruminated. Then she went to the door and called loudly,
“Yellow Dragon!” The table sniffed.
“What do you want him for?”
“You will see,” she said. She sat and waited and presently there was a rush of wind, a whizzing sound and a yellow, short dragon landed on the other side of the door and peeped into the room at them.
“This door never gets any bigger does it,” he said softly. “Who are you?”
“Alicia.”
“How do you do.”
“You are very polite.”
“Of course I was taught to speak English by a very particular caterpillar.”
“ I was trying to get into the garden to see you but I could not fit through the door.”
“That would stop you getting in but it equally stops the flowers getting out.”
“They want to get out?”
“Oh most definitely. Everyone wants to get out now and then.”
“But the garden itself doesn’t want to leave.”
“I wouldn’t know, the garden and I rarely talk. We used to play cards a lot but she kept on losing. She is a very bad loser.”
“Oh that’s a shame.”
“Oh nothing for you to be ashamed of, now being a bad winner would be terribly inappropriate but one or two here are.”
“Oh that is worse!” Agreed Alicia.
“So now I am here what would you like me to do?”
“I have a friend called Mr. Cheng and he asked me to bring you to him.”
“Did he say why?”
“No.”
“I don’t visit people unless I have a why.”
“You don’t?”
“Do you?”
“I never thought about it before. I suppose I don’t. I visit auntie for the madeira cake and Annie for her soups. And I visit uncle Edmund when I need advice and cousin Graham because he always makes me laugh..”
“This Mr Cheng, is he overweight?”
“He is.”
“Then I know him and I won’t be going to visit him at all.”
“Why not?”
“Exactly.”
“I don’t understand.
“Well I only visit people when I have a ‘why’ and when I have a ‘why not’ I certainly don’t visit them.”
“Then I came all this way for nothing.”
“I thought you may have,” said the table.
“You never said anything to me!”
“I wasn’t sure. Besides I needed a good polish.”
“However if you want I will give you a present.” the yellow dragon lifted a paw and stretched out and gave Alicia a small, yellow statue of a dragon.
“Oh that is rather beautiful,”she said. Then the dragon whispered into her ear and she laughed, “Well I never,” she said.
“Never what?”asked the table.
“Well table, this is not the only way into the garden.”
“It isn’t?”
“No it isn’t. You see the label says three sips making sure no one ever takes more than three sips. But if you take more than three sips you can always find your way into the garden.”
“Really?”
“Really.”
“How?”
“Why through my imagination which is the door into everything.”
The polished table shone brightly. That, it thought, was what it called thinking.
Alicia turned her parachute upside down and floated back up the hole. Alicia gave Mr Cheng the statue and told him he was a very bad man for being a thief and Mr Cheng wanted to curl into a ball and vanish being told off by a young girl. And Alicia...

Well Alicia learned a good deal about the garden in the months ahead and she even played cards with the yellow dragon and he complimented her on what a good loser she was.

Posted: 19.4.2008 at 04:51

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